A retired corporate executive decided to take a vacation. He booked himself on a Caribbean cruise and proceeded to have the time of his life...until the boat sank! He found himself on an island with no other people, no supplies, nothing, only bananas and coconuts. After about four months, while lying on the beach, the most gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows up to the shore. He asks,"Where did you come from? How did you get here?" She replies, "I rowed from the other side of the island. I landed here when my cruise ship sank." "Amazing," he says. "You were really lucky to have a row boat wash up with you." "Oh, this?" replies the woman. "I made the boat out of raw material I found on the island. The oars were whittled from gum tree branches. I wove the bottom from palm branch and the sides and stern came from a Eucalyptus tree. "But, where did you get the tools?" She replied. "On the south side of the island, a very unusual stratum of alluvial rock is exposed. I found if I fired it to a certain temperaturein my kiln, it melted into forgeable ductile iron. I used the product to createtools with which I made the items that I required.The guy is stunned. "Let's row over to my place," she says. After a few hours of rowing, she docks the boat at a small wharf, As the man looks to shore, he sees a stone walk leading to an exquisite bungalow painted in blue and white.While the woman ties up the rowboat with an expertly woven hemp rope, the man stares ahead, dumb struck As they walk into the house, she says casually, "It's not much, but I call it home sit down, please. Would you like a drink?" "No. No, thank you," he says, still dazed. "Can't take any more coconut juice." "It's not coconut juice," the woman replies. "I have a still. How about a Pina Colada?" Flummoxed, the man accepts, and they sit down on her couch to talk. After they have exchanged their stories, the woman announces, "I'm going to slip into something more comfortable. Would you like to take ashower and shave? There is a razor upstairs in the bathroom cabinet." The man entered the bathroom to find a cabinet in which a razor made from a bone handle with two shells honed to a hollow ground edge and fastened inside a swivel mechanism. "This woman is amazing," he muses. "What next?" When he returns, she greets him wearing nothing but vines and flowers strategically positioned, and smelling of gardenias. She beckons for him to sit down next to her! "Tell me," she begins suggestively, slithering closer to him, "We've been out here for a really long time. You've been lonely. There's something I'm sure you really feel like doing right now, something you've been longing for all these months?" She stares into his eyes and takes his hand in hers... He can't believe what he's hearing.
He swallows excitedly, tears start to form in his eyes, and says, "You mean...I can check my e-mail from here?"

A farmer had been taken many times by the local car dea1er..... One day the car. Dealer informed the farmer that he was coming over to buy a cow. So the farmer priced like this.

Basic Cow $200.00
TwoToneExterior. $45.00
ExtraStomach $75.00
Produce Storage Comp, $60.00
Straw Chopper $150.00
FourSpigots$lO@ $40.00
Cowhide Upholstry $150.00
DualHorns $15.00
Auto.Fly Swatter $35.00
Various Extra’s $35.00
Fertilizer Attach. $150.00
Farmer’s Sug. List $930.00
Additional Dealer Adj. $300.00

Total ListPrice: $1,230.00

Running Doe A young Native American woman went to a doctor for her first Ever physical exam. After checking all of her vitals and running the Usual tests, the doctor said, "Well, Running Doe, you are in fine Health. I could find no problems. I did notice one abnormality however." "Oh, what is that, Doctor?""Well, you have no nipples." "None of the people in my tribe have nipples," she replied."That is Amazing," said the doctor. "I'd like to write this up for The South Dakota Journal of Medicine if you don't mind. She said, "OK." "First of All"asked the doctor, "how many people are in your tribe?"She answered, "Approximately 500.""And what is the name of your tribe?" asked the doctor. Running Doe Replied,"We're called .

(You know me, I hate to do this to you)
(I really do hate to do this to you; LIKE HELL!!!!!, I love it!)


"The Indiannippleless Five Hundred

Seems the BBB got a complaint the other day about a scam that AFLAC was taking advantage of women on the street and stealing their money.

Now we all at one time thought that an INSURANCE Company has stolen from us, however this scam is netting COLD HARD CASH from unsuspecting individuals.

The way it works is the thief uses children to distract the target. While admiring the cuteness of the kids they are robbed of their cash and never know what hit them.

I'm sending this out for all to be aware that this is happening and it's right out on the streets where the general public is. A passer by with a digital camera phone happen to capture the photo above.

Review it carefully and use caution when distractions like this come along.