JOKES AND MANY MORE!
What happens when you play a country song backards? You get your dog back, your truck back and your girlfriend back!!!
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Did you hear about the dyslexic lawyer who studied all year for the bra exam?
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a flounder? One's a bottom dwelling scum sucker...the other's a fish! + You're in a cage with a real mean bear , a lawyer and a gun with only 2 bullets. What do you do? You shoot the lawyer twice, the bear's the least of your problems. How can you tell the differnce between a lawyer and a skunk lying in the middle of the road? The skunk is the one with the skid marks in front of it!
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These two cannibals were eating a clown when one of them looks at the other and asks "does this taste kinda funny to you?"
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Two guys are hunting in the forest and they run across a bear. They both take off running, after a while one guy stops and takes off his backpack and takes out a pair of running shoes. The other guy sees this and is wondering what is going on, so he stops, runs back to the guy and asks "Why are you putting on your running shoes, do you really think you are going to be able to out run that bear with those?" the other guy said "I don't have to out run the bear, I just have to out run YOU!" What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? ELEPHINO!(hell if I know)
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THE BEST LAWYER JOKE: How can you tell if a lawyer is lying? * His lips are moving.
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THE BEST NATURE JOKE: 2 worms crawling through the grass. Male worm says to female worm " how about you and I going back to your place? Female worm says " ok" they get back to her place and the male worm notices that she has on a wedding ring. Male worm says " I'm sorry honey but I don't do this sort of thing with married worms. fermale worm says " don't worry, my husband is not coming home. Male worm says " how do you know that for sure? Female worm says " he got up early this mornin g and went fishing! Man getting ready to celebrate his 100th birthday. All his freinds get together and send him a woman. She knocks at his door and he answers it to find every mans dream girl. She says to him - I'm here to give you supersex. He says to the young lady - thanks for coming over young lady but I think it will have to be the soup!
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THE MOST CREATIVE JOKES For People who like peace and quiet: A phoneless cord. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again? Shin: A device for finding furniture in the dark.
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In a school the teacher asks Johnny - "If there are 3 birds sitting on a wire and if u shoot the middle one then how many birds remain ?" Johnny takes a moment and says "None !" "How ?" the teacher asks. "Well if u shoot one of them then the rest of them will fly away !" replied Johnny.
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If nothing sticks to Teflon how does Teflon stick to a pan?