Say What? words to live by................

Sometimes, when I look at my children, I say to myself "Lillian, you should have remained a virgin."-- Lillian Carter (mother of Jimmy Carter)
I had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalog: "No good in a bed, but fine against a wall."-- Eleanor Roosevelt
Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister, and now wish to withdraw that statement.-- Mark Twain
The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending; and to have the two as close together as possible.-- George Burns
Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year.-- Victor Borge
Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.-- Mark Twain
By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.-- SocratesI was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.-- Groucho Marx
My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe.-- Jimmy Durante
I have never hated a man enough to give his diamonds back.-- Zsa Zsa Gabor