Dear Internal Revenue Service:

Enclosed you will find my 2005 tax return showing that I owe $3,407.00 in
taxes. Please note the attached article from the USA Today newspaper; dated
12 November, wherein you will see the Pentagon (Department of Defense) is
paying $171.50 per hammer and NASA has paid $600.00 per toilet seat.

I am enclosing four (4) toilet seats (valued @ $2,400) and six
(6) hammers valued @ $1,029), which I secured at Home Depot, bringing my
total remittance to $3,429.00. Please apply the overpayment of $22.00 to the
'Presidential Election Fund,' as noted on my return. You can do this
inexpensively by sending them one (1) 1.5' Phillips Head screw (see
aforementioned article from USA Today newspaper detailing how HUD pays
$22.00 each for 1.5' Phillips Head Screws). One screw is enclosed for your
convenience.

It has been a pleasure to pay my tax bill this year, and I look forward to
paying again next year.

Sincerely, A Satisfied Taxpayer"